Pink: Why don’t we see it anymore?
It truly is a wonderful world in which we live. How amazing is it that we have so many ways to individualize ourselves to show just how creative and absolutely personalized we have become? On top of that we can make these personalizatons evolve in infinite means, or simply scrap the lot and start something new and unique. The possibilities are as vast as our imaginations can perceive.
You know what I have never seen, which still amazes me to this day? Why have I never seen a blond woman wearing copious amounts of pink? I don’t mean the Vickies Pink, I mean pink cell phone cases with matching backpack shoes and top. Where is this? Why has no enterprising individual taken the effort to dye their hair a strenuously false shade of blond and adorn herself with the most sickeningly Pepto-Pink accoutrements in history? Where is this ‘blond and pink?’
OK ladies and gents, this is the deal. Why are there so many women out there who have decided that the end all be all of fashion is this detestable combo of bleach blond hair and pink clothing? Is there no originality put there? In this wave of peroxide we do find the rare Rockabilly, Goth, Punk, Pin-up, Lolita, Harajuku, and other styles… But they happen so infrequently that I am starting to think this ‘blond and pink’ pandemic is starting to get out of control. Sure, you average college nimrod is going to seek out your toeheaded falsities like a twat seeking missile, but is that really all you care about? I mean… Damn. If getting one crappy lay after another is your only goal in life, then sure, go for it. But please, think of the children. What happens when you mix two shallow gene pools? It might get a little deeper, but the chlorine mixture is WAY off.
Let me put it this way. I have an ‘in-law’ relation who shall not be named. She is your typical shallow, insurance fraudulent, all shine no polish, uneducated maroon who showed up at her kids graduation ceremony in, you guessed it, a pink sweatsuit and sneakers combination that showed off her goods. She may not be blond, but the over extravagant amount of pink balanced out the equation.
My point? Try… PLEASE… Try to be a jet setter. Be original. Do whatever you can to stem this tide of pink and peroxide. It lost it’s quirkiness with Legally Blond and it should have died there. Please, if you have any hope for the existence and future of humanity, end this bane on the human race quickly… We don’t have much time left before it takes us all.
Asocial Relativity 